Had one of those dreams again last night. In which I wake up, panicked. Because I dream-cheated on him. It’s a recurring theme of my dreams, though the dreams themselves vary. But the themes are always the same. I dream-cheat. I date someone else on the side, I have an affair, I question if I want to be with him.
And then I wake up and I hate myself for it.
And while I can remind myself that it’s very likely OCD manifesting its spins in my dreams, there’s that little part of me that wonders…are those dreams me? Am I a cheater? Will I cheat? Do I love him?